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Life is not about getting to the destination, life is what happens to you on the way there. 

Monday, May 30, 2005

Guard your plants

cause I've got a power tool! If you saw the amount of trimmings I took off my poor bushes today, you'd think I was committing vegicide. Bwa-ha-ha!

Up until the other day, we always trimmed the bushes with manual hedge clippers that were rather rusty and dull - therefore making the job difficult and for the most part we didn't bother with it. (Yeah - it looked like a jungle for part of the year) But this year we saw that hedge trimmers were only $30 at home depot so we bought those instead of paying roughly that same amount for the once a year lawn trimmer guy.

Well, now I own the trimmers - and 100 feet of extension cord. DH was asking me how I wanted the bushes trimmed but I assured him that I would take care of it. Oh yes. We will take care of it my preshus - just you and me and 100 foot of extension cord!

DH laughed at me when I first powered that thing up - oh it was such fun - I was laughing hysterically as I sliced the tall poky bits off the tops of my front bushes with a brief swipe. Poke at me will you? See this? This is your unmaker - time to meet the undertaker you darn poky things! How dare you grow a spare branch that just so happens to be less than 3/4 inch thick? You have to be thicker than that for the slicer to let you live! The slicer will have it's way with you you puny plant!

It was so fun- I wanted to hold the trimmer over my head and scream like He-Man "I have the POW-AHHHHH". However, I didn't dare, because electric hedge trimmers are sharp and cutty - and the last time I held anything over my head it was a ladder that bumped the insulated wires connected to the house (gutter cleaning) and when I noticed why the ladder was being stubborn and not wanting to move, I about peed my pants and thanked the inventor of high voltage power line insulation because idiots like me will kill ourselves someday.

Oh - and ant bites? They don't feel so good on your shoulders and armpits. I was lucky though - I only got sunburnt and ant-bitten. DH got bit by a horsefly that left him with a STREAM OF BLOOD dripping down his leg. Oh - and firstborn's toenail? almost off. It was a rather gory day for all today - plant massacre - bug bites, de-nailed toe.... Doesn't all this descriptiveness make you want to come and visit? Are you sure?


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