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Life is not about getting to the destination, life is what happens to you on the way there. 

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Why I had kids.....

Because they sure do make life unpredictable.

Let me start out by saying Happy Fourth of July to all! And as for me? I'm going to buy a new toilet. Oh, but let me explain.

Today started out with a plugged toilet. Firstborn usually is the plugger so he was the de-plugger by default. Life rolls on and we cooked burgers and ate lunch. Middlechild used the toilet and came running out in near hysterics.
"The toilet overflowed! It's all poopy!"
Um, ,yeah, well it didn't overflow - but got uncomfortably close to the rim. Again Firstborn is called and he plunges. The toilet flushes again, but not for long. DH and I can't figure out what the heck is wrong with it - the water isn't going too fast, the toilet is acting plugged but nithing is stoppering it up. Plunge again and it flushes mostly good so we chalk it up to Firstborn tossing dried cat turds in it or something and leave it alone.
Fast forward to bedtime. It's plugged again. That's when Youngest mentions that maybe something fell into the toilet. Maybe. And maybe it got flushed. She's just sayin. Maybe - that's all.
My parental radar did all the normal WOOOP WOOOP WOOOP when somethign is suspect. I moved to defcon 2 and proceeded to pump her for more information.
"You member the fish statue onna shelf in da baffroom dat nobody can touch? Maybe it fell off - the glass one and maybe a piece of it got flushed. "
"Did you flush my fish?"
""I saw a tail inna toilet...."
"Did you pick it out?"
"Stick my hand in there??? NO dat's gross"
"Did you tell someone else to get it for you?"
"No it was just in there"
"Did you flush it?"
"When did oyu flush it"
"I dinnit flush it, ,I just use da potty"
"Did this happen today?"
"I don't know, maybe yesterday"
"It happened yesterday?"
"Maybe long time ago. Maybe it happened long time ago when the glas fish tail got inna toilet"
By this time I figured she was remembering a blown glass fish that fell into the toilet and shattered - we had to don gloves to pick out the glass so it would not get flushed. We went back to flushign and plunging. Then - she comes back and reminds us that maybe a piece of the fish fell in. I remembered a resin fish figurine that was in teh bathroom on the shelf - I asked Firstborn to go get it and there it was - the 3 inch by three inch fish was no longer on the base of the figurine. It has shattered neatly in half and I assumed that the half I didn't see was now stuck in the bowels of my toilet.

I asked her why she didn't tell us in the first place so we could pick it out instead of trying to plunge it through (cause if it wasn't wedged before, it sure is now. ) She told us that she didn't want to get in trouble. I asked her how much a broken toilet would get her into trouble? Her eyes got big and she said "The toilet's broken?" It never occurred to her that flushing something will break the toilet. I hope it's a lesson she never forgets. When we disassemble the toilet and take it off - guess who will be helping?


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh this is just too cute!! "Pay backs, Pay backs!!!!" hee hee, Love MOM

7/05/2006 01:16:00 PM  
Blogger Jen said...

Aw geez. When I was little, I had a cheapo lipstick case that I filled with pennies. I put it on the back of the toilet as I used it. The pennies spilled out and into the toilet. I tried flushing them down. They just stayed in the bottom. Toilet paper on top of them just flushed down, but not the pennies. So I figured something BIGGER had to push them down, a hand towel! So that just plugged the toilet, it didn't go all the way down, so I thought something SILKY needed to smooth it down, so I dumped a bunch of baby powder on the towel in the pot. When that didn't go down, I finally got my mom.

7/13/2006 10:49:00 PM  

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